Just when I was feeling high on the euphoria of love that the heavens had to bring me crashing back down to earth. I guess that's life. I came back to 'terra nullius' yesterday feeling sad that I had to leave the comforts of home. It's funny how things work out. I'd think that after 18 years under the guardful watch of my parents, I'd be happy to finally leave home. Eventhough not permanently, but still... But being the way I am, I miss my family a lot. I actually miss being nagged 'live' by my mom. There's just no feeling when you're being nagged on the phone. I miss fighting with my siblings and making up at the end of the day. I miss debating with my dad. Most of all, I miss just being with them. I am so grateful to have a place to call home.
Anyway, back to what I wanted to say. Today, my mid-semester exam results came out. I didn't do too well. Given the circumstance that I was in while I did the exams, I only have me to blame. I cannot put the blame on microscopic organisms. Should've taken really good care of myself. Hopefully, I do not get sick again for my finals! Friends, pray with me... ;-)
Today, one can see happy faces and also sad faces. Faces of people who are elated or the faces of the ones who are satisfied. Faces of people who are determined to do better or the faces of people who have given up. Now, what made me think when being put in this kind of situation is...why do some give up while others are determined to do better when met with failure? The answer that I have found out is : purpose. Now, let's look at it logically; if someone has a goal in life, would they throw away their dreams and efforts just because they met with failure or many failures? I think not. I've met failures before and it's true that I was really down. I actually needed someone to pick me up again. For that, I have to thank my family and friends. But after the feeling of hopelessness and self-blame passes, I regained my spirit and started to fight for my dreams again. I'm doing that now. I've always known that I have a purpose in life.That's the reason, I believe that God gave me a second chance at life. I have found my raison d'être. One need to have a rationale before having a purpose in life. You've got to know the reason of doing something before you do it. My reason? For myself,my family and for everyone who has faith in me. I can never let them down. Most of all, I cannot let myself down.
If anyone who's feeling down out there, please don't give up. Life's not worth giving up. And exams, up to a certain point they do matter a lot. It's proof that you are able to handle your subject. But again, they are not everything. Plus, nobody is stupid as a French saying goes : " Genius is nothing more than a great aptitude for patience. "
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